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I Asked People Who They Would Cast For A New Version Of "Lady Marmalade" And The Results Were Amazing

Everyone knows the “Lady Marmalade” cover of Patti Labelle’s classic from Moulin Rouge is ICONIC and basically the official national anthem of thots everywhere. Mya, Xtina, Lil Kim, and Pink did what? They did THAT.

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Anyway, as a homosexual, some of my favorite things in life include arguing which Jonas brother is the hottest, watching Barefoot Contessa reruns, and causing national weather disasters.


But my favorite thing as a homo to do is start drama! And I did just that the other day when I tweeted this little challenge out. And let me tell you, the gays DELIVERED with their responses.

You can find out all you need to know about a gay man by asking who he'd pick for a 2018 version of "Lady Marmalade"

The most popular choice so far: Plucking arguably the four biggest names possible, and running with it.

@sbstryker Beyoncé, Nicki, Britney and Rihanna

Although…some people (including me!) think Bey might just blow the other girlies out of the water!

@sbstryker Everybody who is picking Beyoncé for this is disrespectful. The Queen is too great for this role.

This version has EVERYTHING. Beyoncé. Gaga. Céline Dion who can serve us FRENCH vocals. A DRAG QUEEN (RuPaul)?! Sign me up.

There were plenty of straightforward choices…

@sbstryker Nicki minaj
Jessie J
Lady Gaga


…and I noticed Ariana Grande was probably the most popular choice.

@Coryjubroke_it @sbstryker Ariana Grande
Lady Gaga

Here’s a slightly more oddball choice that I think would work magnificently:

@sbstryker BUT if we go for the girls who aren’t “icons” in that way…

Charli XCX

Co-produced by SOPHIE and Grimes

Or we could just pick Little Mix, the no-assembly-required choice, and call it a day?

@sbstryker we all ready have the 2018 lady marmalade

Love this old school interpretation…

@sbstryker Cher, Cyndi Lauper, Debbie Harry, & Dolly Parton. I know, weird mix & it would never happen but I can dream can’t I?

…and this one (Etta would have to be a hologram, plus the OG singer Patti for extra points)…

@sbstryker Etta James, Aretha Franklin, Tina Turner, Patti Labelle…


…and this throwback, too!

@sbstryker Madonna, Janet, Mariah, and Missy

Kind of here for this extra queer version:

@sbstryker Beth Ditto
Lady Gaga
Perfume Genius

And yeah…some people didn’t want to mess with a good thing:

@sbstryker What is wrong with you people?

Lil' Kim
Christina Aquilera

I mean…they have a point.

@sbstryker Leave the classic alone. There will never be a perfect combination like that ever again, ever.

The 4 el…

For the record…here is who I would pick.

Mine would be:
Dua Lipa
Ariana Grande
Maren Morris
Cardi B

OK, now your turn. Who would YOU dream-cast in a 2018 version of “Lady Marmalade”?